Dear Target,

Your email stinks.

Had I shopped at your store before, maybe I’d have seen what crummy shape your customer emails are in. Perhaps I’d have pitched my email writing services to you.

All I wanted was a simple & colorful gift card to be mailed to my niece, a brand-new, first-time mom. How hard an order is that to fill? Do you literally manufacture every gift card when an order is placed? I think not.

So how can you explain this clunky email that arrived in the middle of the night? I thought it was a fake. Evidently, it’s not.

My email from Target at 2 am this morning:

Subject: There‚s a delay on your order.

hello Margaret,

We just found out about an unexpected delay that affects your order (Order#XXXXXXXXXXXXX) placed on 03/15/2014. We’re sorry, but we may not be able to deliver your item(s) by the estimated delivery date you received with your original order. New estimated delivery date(s) are included below.

You will not be charged for any items until they ship. If items need to be shipped separately, your shipping charges will not increase.

The delayed items will be automatically shipped to you if they become available before the new estimated delivery date.We’re sorry for the inconvenience and we will get the items to you as quickly as we can.

Thanks for shopping at Target.

Team Target

May I suggest you go get a refresher course on basic use of punctuation? While you’re at it, try and add some space between your paragraphs. You also might want to use a space between sentences. And who came up with that weird subject line?

Buy something at Amazon and see what well-crafted emails you get from them.

Don’t thank me for shopping at Target, Team Target. When I called customer service (first having to hunt down a telephone number on your site, thanks for that), the rep suggested I get a Target card so that my orders get shipped faster. Nice touch. I don’t blame her, though; she didn’t write the email.

I’ll let you get back to manufacturing my gift card.

Margie

PS: If you must deliver bad news to a customer, try sending a well-written email. Make sure you test it, proof it, and are confident that every i is dotted and so on. I know the emails are automated, but still…